Tonight I am writing to share how I feel about the recent shootings in the United States. And in that, to invite you to share with your community, how you feel. I have no idea if this is helpful or not, to share. I know it is helpful for me to ‘do something’ with love, to call us from despair to love. The helpless feeling is so immobilizing. Further on in the note, I make a suggestion of one thing you can do….and offer a song that often helps me drop into feeling.
Here it goes…
How I feel:
I’m incredibly sad it has come to this. We created this together and I believe as humans we can create something better. But it seems so far away.
My compassion extends to those harmed, and those harming, and all families and our sweet earth. My mother taught me to also care about those who hurt others, and I do, I really do. I am sad for them too. They are part of our sickness.
When hard things happen it is often hard to know what to say. Just begin with how you feel and honor your own experience. From there we are more authentic and in our body and can act on behalf of others. If we keep hiding our emotion, it gets bottled up.
When the 19 year old young man was asked at Gilroy, why he was doing this he said, “because I’m really angry.” I hear his voice echoing out.
I am more sad than angry but I have had some really angry times in my early days of awakening to this place we find ourselves in. I feel no blame in a traditional sense, I feel connected to all parts of it.
How I feel is tired of a world where violence is rampant. How I feel is deep compassion for those called to violence. How I feel is those who are doing the shooting, are our messengers of the hidden grief of our country. We must listen ~ let’s not miss this message from the core and cry of humanity. Asking us to pay close attention. Often I feel helpless to help and have a challenging time thinking about policy when my heart aches. How I feel is that I don’t know what I can really do. How I feel is that there is so much sorrow and I am grateful to experience joy amidst all of it
I have just enjoyed a beautiful evening of good friendship and food and laughter and dancing – and how I feel is I am grateful for all the goodness I have in my life which makes me strong. How I feel, is I am getting stronger every day to be resilient, so I can be of service. Instead of shut down.
I try to take it in, without taking it on.
I know one thing you can do…it may seem small but it is important, read below.
I am so sorry Beloved ones for the pain you feel, we feel. I feel I cannot say anything worthwhile but feel I must say something. I made this art just now and thought I might share it with you….it can help to just move a pen.
Our community has experienced family and friends deaths by gunshot on enough occasions that close to home rings true. I feel astonished.
I pray, but it is hard to imagine it ‘doing something’ other than making me feel more connected to the Divine, which it does so I imagine that is enough.
Thinking of each of you in the way that love reaches everywhere.
20 Mass shootings (4 or more people) and over 1000 shot in the United States by August 3, 2019
Edited on Aug. 6. I removed the references to violent video games. Trying to be in integrity and will update this post again soon with actions we can take and new information.
A Letter from the Red Thread Cafe #754
Dear One,
I am sending blessings to your home tonight….
I don’t really have too much to say beyond what I said above for now. It is almost midnight in New Jersey and I have a workshop to teach tomorrow so I will be brief. I want to get myself ready for this circle to greet each woman with my heart open. So to prepare, I make art, write to you, learn of what is taking place in our country.
I don’t know how to help, but I do know something you can do right now (or very soon as time is of the essence, especially after a mass shooting)
Call a ‘How I feel’ circle for your friends. For your family and invite them to just share out loud how they feel when hard things happen. If you are brave enough, maybe include a red thread in that conversation so that each person can hold onto it.
Holding on for dear life, honoring this dear life.
I have so much to tell you about this week but it will have to wait, for now.
A few resources, a free painting class called Colorful Scars, not about shooting but about grief and the body and it is free. I have also put one of my favorite songs below to touch your heart. After a good cry, music helps me to stay present. Today I cried a lot for all kinds of different reasons. I am sharing this song with you like medicine. This will be the last thing I watch tonight before rest. Hugs. Hugs. Huge hugs.