Say to your hidden self: I am sorry
I didn’t know you were in here. I am here now.
(a new writing and the underbelly of a painting in process)
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Say to your hidden self
Say to your hidden self:
I am sorry. I didn’t know you were in here. I am here now.
I didn’t know, how to speak to you.
I am willing to learn your language. Show me the ways.
I don’t know how to approach you.
Yet I will try…in the humble desire of becoming.
Let me be supple in my invitations.
Say to your hidden self: (as if looking into the eyes of one you love)
I love you, even without knowing you, really.
Yet I have always known you…somehow.
May these words be an offering, on your altar.
I am here now. I know I didn’t listen.
I know it was a long ride home. Please. Forgive me.
I am ready to show up.
I wasn’t taught how to think about you.
Let alone that it was okay, to feel how I feel.
Now that I know that you are here, I am at home.
Say to your hidden self: (as if you are speaking to a child you knew, now grown)
When I was yet a little one, we talked and played.
Now that I am grown, I hope we can talk and play again!
I want to know, what I have been hiding from myself!
I have no interest in being asleep to you!
I trust, that all the stories I have already lived,
can be useful preparation for this encounter.
You are so much bigger since the last time I saw you.
You are beautiful. I have missed you.
Would you join me for a cup of tea? We have so much to talk about…
Say to your hidden self (now more revealed…)
I have been waiting for you. I see your edges ripple.
I shall wait no more, but be here, where you are. S
how me, dearest soul, how to live as myself.
~ Shiloh Sophia
January 15, 2017 #IMAGINE
#WIP Work in Progress for the IMAGINE Course from Cosmic Cowgirls
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There is much work that can happen, regardless of the chaos around us, to tend the chaos within us. For me, it begins with a conversation with the soul. The often hidden self that speaks all the time, but will we listen?
When I paint, I listen with the inside ears and see with the inside eyes. For oh so many years I have created in this way and tasted the sweetness of this inquiry. And today I share it with you. I hope it speaks to you where you are. How you do listen to the hidden self?
Must we say I am sorry? I think the humility in the offer of moving from one who has not listened well to being willing to listen is an awesome place to say I am sorry. Works for me. Once the apologies are spoken, we move on. No longer in apology but walking unapologetic, into a deepening relationship with soul.
If this is not useful, leave this email to washed clean in the rains and it will be carried towards another who needs it…
With a river of love from the Red Thread Cafe between tomorrow and today,
This is where the inquiry started a few days ago – filmed live for IMAGINE.
All day I think about it, then at night I say it.
Where did I come from, and what am I supposed to be doing?
I have no idea. My soul is from elsewhere, I’m sure of that,
and I intend to end up there.
Who says words with my mouth? Who looks out with my eyes?
What is the soul? I cannot stop asking.